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Won't you people ever learn?

I've tried to help you people think more analytically about the game of hockey, but sometimes I wonder if the message is ever going to get through. I've laid out that fact that there's a significant lefty/righty matchup advantage to be exploited in the shootout, that indicators like Goals For & Against are perhaps a better barometer of team success than standings points, and that penalties taken & drawn are hugely important, and under-appreciated.

Yet I don't think that statistically-driven analysis has taken the NHL by storm. TV Analysts drone on with their bland, uninsightful comments and ignorant fans accept them on blind faith because they don't know any better.

Perhaps it's time to take another tack, using video instruction to drive the point home:

There, that oughta do it. I expect those job offers for Director of Quantitative Analysis will be landing on my doorstep shortly...

Tip o' the Hat to the guys at On Frozen Blog for uploading this to YouTube. When we saw this on the NHL Network, Mrs. Forechecker immediately said "you've GOT to post that..."