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Saturday’s Dump & Chase: Conditional Comedy

Nashville Predators News & Notes

Little Skates, Big Hustle: Nashville Predators’ Youth Hockey Initiatives | On the Forecheck
Ann brings us up to date on some of the work the possible future draft picks of the next decade or two are up to right now.

Other News & Notes

Flames, Oilers hoping problem wingers can rekindle lost form | Sportsnet.ca
The conditional pick in the trade of James Neal for Milan Lucic is hilarious. The Flames will get a third-round pick if Neal scores at least 21 goals and–are you ready?–Lucic scores at least ten fewer than Neal does. That’s just petty. I love it. Let’s say–this is absurd, but let’s say it anyway–that Neal scores 35 goals on McDavid’s wing and Lucic scores 30 somehow with Calgary. No pick for the Flames for sending them a guy who can actually convert McDavid’s assists!

Maple Leafs’ Marner mum on contract negotiations | ProHockeyTalk
I’m including this less because anyone left on this planet who isn’t a Maple Leafs fan or hoping their GM will offer-sheet Mitch Marner actually cares about this situation, and more because I misread the headline as “Maple Leafs’ Marner’s mum on contract negotations” and thought “oh no, her too? his dad wasn’t enough?”

The article’s fine, I guess. There’s an instagram video of Marner on a surfboard? It’s July; I don’t know what to say.

Editorial: The Undecided | The Ice Garden
I can’t imagine having to make a career decision this big with reporters across the continent watching me to see what I’d do. Best of luck to all the women trying to figure out whether to go on playing hockey and try to work for improvement from within or to strike and lose some of their very limited career time in the hopes of making bigger, bolder changes.

Artemi Panarin’s criticism of Vladimir Putin ‘absolutely unprecedented’ | Sportsnet.ca
This isn’t just remarkable because it’s a Russian athlete speaking against Putin (though that is, as the Sportsnet article emphasizes, very rare)–Panarin plays in a sports league that doesn’t like to comment on the world around it, with the NHL and North American hockey priding themselves on their disengagement. We all–athletes included–live in the world, and Panarin addresses that too, even though he’s primarily speaking about Russia.

In sum, a genuinely astonishing article to run across for a lot of reasons.

Trouba gets seven-year, $56 million deal from Rangers | ProHockeyTalk
I still don’t know what the Jets were doing trading Jacob Trouba, but he’s getting paid and good luck to him. Today has been a day for me saying nice things about the Rangers; I’m still from the wrong part of New York for that to feel good.

Why Wild are better off being terrible next season | ProHockeyTalk
…I’m not gonna say it.